Enduring Homesickness

I think I would rather go through another blood test before having to endure the pain-staking effects of being homesick. Before getting to New York, I had this idea that everything would be so perfect and things would just fall into place. Things like finding good friends, making a ton of money, finding a really nice apartment and making a ton of connections. The hard part is, all of these things don't come that simply. In all actuality, things you want in life come in a unique, unexpected and sometimes annoying way. One of the most important things on my list was finding good friends. This being obvious since I'm in a new place, but I really want good friends because I want to build a family away from home. Once I find good friends, I think that is when New York will really feel like a home away from home to me. It's tough not having those awesome friends yet because I constantly feel lonely and am reminded that I'm definitely not comfortable in New York  yet. On Sunday morning, I woke up literally feeling sick. Now I didn't know if it was because of the treacherous germs on the subway or what, but I knew something was up. By the time I was in the shower, I realized what my condition was; homesickness. I realized this because of the obvious signs, crying in the shower and then proceeding to the toilet to only whine, "I want my mommy." Yes, I still call my mom mommy sometimes...But really, this sudden change of life events has really taken a toll on my body emotionally, psychologically and physically. This homesickness also brought up a lot of dark childhood memories for me, that is why I knew my condition right away. When I was younger, I felt these same hopeless feelings whenever I went to my dad's house. Dad's house was not home and neither was New York. Considering past experiences, I knew the only way to cure these symptoms was to in fact call my mommy. After calling my mommy, she helped me realize why I made my decision to move to New York in the first place. New York is not home right now because everything I see reminds me of how things used to be. Life isn't going to just happen the way I want it to, but in time, things will get better. My mom assured me that if I'm ever feeling lonely, I can always come home, but once my life actually does start falling in place, living in New York will be A LOT easier. Things I can tell you that will cure homesickness: Call your mommy or daddy whenever you feel lonely, allow yourself to cry sometimes (even if it's in public or mid pee on the toilet), bring photos and positive memorabilia from home, this helps you feel more cozy where you are, try and use past experiences to help cope with today and the future and most importantly my friends, realize that you are loved.