Do You Have Direction?

 

Do I have direction? Have you ever just sat and asked yourself, Do I have direction? What is your definition of direction? This could help better answer your question. Your definition could be studying every night to get to that A on your first exam, that's having direction. Or signing yourself up for a weight loss program to get to your goal weight, that's heading in the right direction. According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, the definition of direction is "the course or path on which something is moving or pointing." To me this means, setting yourself on a "path" that eventually leads you to your goal. More specifically moving to New York, putting myself out here and working towards my goal. This may be more drastic than a weight loss program, but sometimes going outside of the painted lines allows you to draw your own path for your future. All of my life I was known as the smart, kind and outgoing girl. Good at school, okay at sports, showed lots of talent and was definitely going to be going somewhere in life. As I got older, everyone that knew me knew that going to college was a no-brainer because it would be easy for me to get in. When I hit my senior year, the pressure was on. I feel that the senior year stigma that people put on you is appropriate, but totally overwhelming. "GO TO COLLEGE HERE!" "GET THIS DEGREE!" "WRITE THIS KIND OF ESSAY!" "DON'T FAIL!" All of these same thoughts and pressures are drilled into your head to make sure that when high school ends, you don't royally screw up. Putting on pressure creates thicker skin, but it can also be distracting for what that senior really wants to do. If I'm being brutally honest, college was not in my heart by the end of my senior year. Why you ask? I knew that college was not the next step in my life to get me to where I needed to be. Yes I got excepted to a great college in New York, but I knew that moving to New York on my own without school would not only be better for myself and my personal strength, but also for where I wanted to get in life. So many kids jump right out of high school with this idea in their head of maybe where they want to go in life and what they want to do. When they get out of college, they're $50k plus in debt and don't generally  end up using the degree they achieve. They thought going to college was the perfect direction, but then 10 years later regret the decision they make. I'm not saying college or earning a degree isn't important, I eventually want to achieve my degree, but I feel so much better taking time off to pursue myself and my dreams on my own. The hard part of this process is remembering that I do in fact still have direction. Most may look at me and call me stupid for wasting my education and not going into college right away. Right now I work in he restaurant business, I pay rent and it's not very glamorous, but I know I'm heading in the right direction. I don't have everything exactly planned out and I have no idea where I'll be in three months, but I know I'm heading in the right direction. Of course I think, college would be easier and people probably are looking down on me, but I believe in myself and the power of my goals. I also believe that everything happens for a reason. When I first came to New York, I was hopeless and thought after my first week, I'd be going home, but there has been things that have kept me here for some reason. From finding a last minute apartment, to getting fired and then hired and meeting some of the people I did, there is still some reason I am here. Working these jobs has taught me hard work and struggle and being away from home, has made me stronger on my own. All these things that I know will help me in the future. I don't have every answer yet and I haven't gotten exactly where I wanted, but I know it will come. It's the direction I'm headed that is propelling me to make my dreams a reality. So to all of you out there who think I'm a lost 18 year old loser, I want to say thank you. Thank you for looking down on me and thinking I have no direction because you motivate me to keep me in the right direction and you also increase the views on my blog.